Merrick Legacy, 6.1

[napoleonherself]

Wow, generating an actual entry from my plaintext writeup is WAY faster with the new flickr + custom regexp option. That's awesome. Cake-level awesome.



Previous entries are here.

General warning: sometimes I swear.

Last time: Arlene, Lyman and Doc Boy had all the college sex ever! In some cases with the same guy! Eww. Also, I finally picked Doc Boy as the heir, and mister Frances J. Worthington III as his husband-to-be! And then they knocked each other up and made me want to kill everything ever. It was a tumultuous time, is what I'm sayin'.

This time:


This generation begins... well, it should begin with a wedding. Instead, grandma Daisy is leaving flowers for dead grandpa Michael. Um.


Aha! This is more like it. Doc Boy and Frances are getting married!


Bonus: this time I actually have the arch facing the right way, so the guests can use the benches I set out.


Wedding spam is fun.


Everyone: Yay! Now their biologically-impossible babies will not also be bastards!

Aw, c'mon. It worked out okay for Adrian.


And since I remembered to buy a cake this time...


...I learn that Doc Boy is not a cake-in-face-smusher! Which is good to know I guess?


Aaaand now it's time for Frances to finally birth that baby he's been carrying since sophomore year.


Then, before people are even done talking about the new arrival, Doc Boy has his baby...


...and then the childcare is left up to the grandparents, since Doc Boy and Frances are off on their honeymoon! Hooray for division of labor.

Except then my game crashes, so the wedding never happened.

...

Dammit.

I stayed up past 2 AM playing it, too.

So instead of the big ceremony with the rain of rose petals and the applauding crowd, and the romantic honeymoon with the shiny convenient boosting of all motives, Doc Boy and Frances get a quick exchange of vows on the lawn. Then their now-nonexistent babies -- forever lost to history except for that last picture up there -- are replaced by new ones.


And this time, Doc Boy has twins.

Maddie and twins Owen and Saint Deadwife Lisa all inherit Frances's gray eyes, and the twins have his black hair. It remains to be seen which facial features they end up with, but I did some peeking in Create-A-Sim while deciding which generation 5 kid to heir, and there is a good chance that we have some awesome combinations coming up.


Speaking of Frances's looks, here is his makeover. I sadly could not find anything to dress him in that was quite as adorably fussy as the sweater he wore in college, thus his richespolo shirt.

Frances actually started out as a Fortune sim, and in my game he had the LTW to top the medical career. But Doc Boy was already Fortune, and I'd just had a double-Fortune generation with Adrian (who had the medical LTW) and Kaylynn. So I rerolled Frances, and now he's Popularity. Of course, I haven't updated his bio from what he shipped with...


...but let's assume that hanging out with the Merricks got him to come out of his shell a bit. And that I will ever get around to writing a bio in this game ever. Which I haven't yet.

(I like how they got his name right in his bio but not when actually naming him.)


What makes this funny is that Frances's new LTW is to top the law enforcement career.

"But Jenny," I hear you asking, because I have your room bugged. "Why is that funny?"


Because Doc Boy's LTW is to top the criminal career.


Doc Boy: Heyyy, tiger. I set up the criminal enterprises, you knock 'em down?
Frances: Sounds fun!

I wonder if they ever get their ties mixed up. Regardless, wacky hijinx abound!


As do toddlers. Man, I thought the triple-threat last generation was going to be a one-off thing.

The old folks are still having adventures too, of course. For instance, Adrian breaks the sink.


Kaylynn: You really need to remember to be more careful with things around here!
Adrian: Yes dear.
Kaylynn: Just because we're well-off doesn't mean it's okay to have the repairman over every day.
Adrian: Yes dear.


OH GOD PLEASE TELL ME YOU MEAN IT


This is the really crappy nanny, though. Would your priority here be to give the happiest toddler a kiss? Because that's what the nanny went with.


Nanny: My work here is done.
Maddie: I gots kisses! :D :D
Lisa: [passed out on floor]


It's like the nanny is a robot with a bum logic circuit.

TARGET: LISA; STATUS: PASSED OUT ON FLOOR
TARGET: OWEN; STATUS: PASSED OUT ON FLOOR SITTING UP
TARGET: MADDIE; STATUS: HAPPILY PLAYING

POSSIBLE RESPONSE:
    PUT LISA TO BED
    PUT OWEN TO BED
    QUIT HARRASSING MADDIE
  - FUCK YOU ASSHOLE

Nanny: Am... am I a bad nanny?

YES.


But of course, MADDIE gets put to bed when she's tired. Holy shit but the twins are going to grow up so warped from all this obviously biased caretaking.

Now, most sim toddlers with mixed face template genetics are kind of horrorshows, meaning I let the kids hit child before I bother caring about how they look. So, then...


Maddie's a decent mix of her dads: mostly Frances, but some definite Doc Boy around the bottom of the face.


Owen is, near as I can tell, a perfect faceclone of Frances, except for Doc Boy's mouth.


And Saint Deadwife Lisa who died of cancer and is dead has Doc Boy's mouth, nose, and eyebrows, and Frances's eyes and jaw. Meaning the girls are good mixes, while Owen is... kind of boring.


What makes Owen somewhat more interesting is the fact that he skills faster than anyone I've seen since his great-great grandma Ruthie back in generation 2. He and Lisa began studying for their first point of cleaning at pretty much exactly the same instant. See how Lisa's not quite earned a point yet? That popup is announcing that Owen just earned his SECOND.

I have no idea what causes some sims to skill faster. I do know that the really fast ones are rare.


Also, here is the girls' bedroom, in red for Maddie and yellow for Lisa...


...and Owen's bedroom, in a sort of lavender-blue palette. Look, I tend to assign colors based on what they wear as toddlers and he went around in pink and baby blue, all right? There's not a lot to pick from in that area of the color wheel.


Anyway. Last is the heir bedroom, in gray for Doc Boy and blue for Frances.

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS VIRTUAL INTERIOR DECORATING IS SO THRILLING.


Owen continues to be smarter than his sisters, rocketing all the way to an A+ grade after his very first day of school.


This... this seems ill-advised at best.


The children, of course, simply must go to only the best schools. Fortunately, the headmaster likes to talk about little toy planes.


And even though he ends the house tour early on account of the skilling room not being "suitable" for children, he still deigns to let them into his school. Yay! I can only assume that the classrooms there are made of feathers and dreams, not blighted with these mere common "chairs".


Scanner: [vrrm vrrm vrrm]


Frances: Yep, that's a ghost, all right. :|


Frances: OH HOLY POOPS IT'S A GHOST

Yes, and you've seen her like a billion times already. The house is haunted by people who can do nothing more than make neener-neener ears at you. Get used to it.


Also, pls to be having another baby, because I'd like to see some more mixing of you guys's genes. Someone inheriting Frances's mouth would be nice.


I'm also still a little disappointed that one of the existing kids is one feature away from being a clone. And, well... hmm, how to put this. Frances is pretty much the most adorable sim ever, I think, although granted my opinion is probably partially formed by the fact that he's got black hair and thick eyebrows and a weak chin just like my dead long-ago fiance who is dead. (OF CANCER wait no that's Lisa look this stuff is funny in my head okay)

Anyway. Frances is more attractive than a little pixel person has any right to be, but shrunk down to child-size his features are... kind of froglike.


Lisa who DIED, you know, OF CANCER: Mwahahaha! Soon our plan will be complete, and great Dagon shall rule over all!
Frances, from offscreen: Did you have a nice day at school today, sweetie?
Lisa: ...yes, dad.


They look so happy... shh, nobody tell them that Adrian's lifebar is running out way faster than Kaylynn's and he probably doesn't have more than about four days to live. :( :(


At least he'll live long enough to see his first three grandkids grow up in silly outfits...


Maddie grows up to be a Family sim, with an LTW to graduate three kids from college. Suddenly her repeated wants to gain cooking skill as a child make a lot more sense.


All my pictures of the kids' makeovers seem to involve them sitting in the living room for some reason.


Now that Maddie has a gender preference (she rolled bi), it's time to blow some of the family's insane wealth on matchmaker dates...


Ugh. No, gypsy. Fail. No less a fail than any of the other times you airdropped her on Merricks past. Xu Xi is A) straight, and B) already going steady with a non-Merrick!


After that I try for a male date, and so Maddie gets this guy who is kind of boring blah blah whatever.


And after that, it's babby time! Well, not immediately after. But whatever.


Doc Boy: Boy, that was exhausting! I'd better sit down!
Frances: What's that, little baby? Daddy Doc Boy is an asshole? Yes, sweetie, he certainly is.


Everyone seems pretty stoked about the new arrival (a purple-eyed girl named Jinx), with a couple of exceptions...


Saint Lisa is annoyed that nobody is paying attention to her.


And Owen is...

Uh...

D:


Adrian and Kaylynn are still kind of ridiculously adorable, for the record. At one point I even catch Kaylynn autonomously serenading her husband.


They also get a lovely portrait together, because they are my favorite legacy couple thus far and I am about two days from Adrian dying and making me sad.


But before the sadness comes the silly transition outfits!


Owen is another Family sim, with an LTW to marry off six children.


And Lisa grows up as a Romance sim who wants to woohoo with 20 different people. Which is some kind of a life goal, I guess. It's like, nineteen is not enough! I must have precisely 20 or else I will never achieve inner peace! MY NETHERS HUNGER FOR FULFILLMENT. (That's what she said.)


All three of the older kids are now teenagers, and mysteeeeriously baby Jinx turns into a toddler way earlier than she technically should have. It looks like she's going to turn out a lot like her siblings, though -- Doc Boy's eye shape and color finally came through, but still not Frances's mouth.


So Doc Boy might or might not have mysteriously had the shortest pregnancy this family has ever seen. BABBEES MOAR NOW PLZ.


Hey look, little Keisha turned nigh-instantly into a toddler just like Jinx! Wow, what a coincidence, huh?

Doc Boy: I know, right? I'm pretty awesome.
Adrian: He kind of is, actually.


Creepy maid: And did you notice that she inherited Frances's mouth?

Yes, creepy maid, I had in fact noticed that! But thank you so much for pointing it out. Please don't roll me up and smoke me.


Creepy maid: No promises.


Me too, Kaylynn. Me too. But at least he's lived long enough to see five grandchildren be born. Six, if I get around to letting Arlene have her university baby.


Incidentally, here is Lisa's teen makeover...


...and Owen's.


And when Jinx grows up to child a couple days early, I dress her up thiswise.


Unfortunately for young Jinx, we're a bit short on bedrooms, so she has to sleep in the nursery, which will be completely repurposed into a child bedroom once Keisha grows up. Until that happens, though... well, this does. Pretty much nightly.

And, since the family has cash to blow and the kids need to meet some new people...


Maddie's first date: this guy. Custom face template, so not heir-eligible, but a decent choice aside from that.


Lisa's first date: Maxis premade with a pretty sweet nose and some pretty sweet dreads (that I gave him, I forget why).


Owen's first date: straight pixel_trade dude who likes to stand with a tree through his face.


Maddie's second date: straight, married mother of three who likes to stand inside trees.


Lisa's second date: this guy. He's been the boytoy of Merrick teenagers since the very first generation of kids graced these halls.


Owen's second date: one of my ownself-created sims who is absolutely NOT Merrick fodder, thankyouveryMUCH, matchmaker lady person.

Owen's date: Aww, but there's hearts up there and everything!

NO.

Basically what I'm saying is that like two of these six selections don't absolutely suck. What does the matchmaker even DO with all this money, anyway? I just gave her $30,000!


So it is that, with one thing and another, time passes. Then, one morning, I realize that I've hit the last time this will ever happen. (Keisha is in the nursery doing toddler things.)

It's been a good run... but Adrian's lifebar is one tick away from a meeting with Grim.

Not ashamed to admit that I quit my play session before that could happen, to stave it off just a little longer.

So that's the end of this update!



Next time: death and the grim march thereto. Also, cake.

Comments

[ryl.livejournal.com]

It took me a minute to get the Saint Deadwife thing. Now that I get it, that shall be her name in Funky Cancerrape forevermore.

[napoleonherself.livejournal.com]

I kind of use way too many in-jokes from the Comics Curmudgeon, with the result that most people have no idea what I'm talking about. But I amuse myself, and that's plainly the most important thing.