napoleonherself | stolen from pixelicious

Love Life

First crush: My cousin when I was, like, seven. My West Virginian cousin. Heh. There's a really meanspirited joke in there somewhere.
First kiss: N/A.
Single or attached?: *superglues herself to some innocent person who's just passing by*
Date around or tied down?: N/A.
Ever been in love?: Yersh.
If so, who and are you still in love?: None of your business, and... um... also none of your business.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: See also: lust.
Do you believe in "the one?": I dunno.
Describe your ideal significant other: Geeky, silly, doesn't do Bad Things (i.e. smoke, dabble in illegal substances, dabble in illegal actions, et cetera), won't roll eyes and tell me to knock it off when I ferretshock over a cute aminal or a piece of shiny aluminum foil or something like that. If you want to get into appearance, then dark hair is nice, and so is a not-particularly-muscular body type. But all that's secondary.
Describe your ideal date: Uhh... to tell you the truth, I am unable to get my brain to parse the idea of me being on a date. Unless sitting around for hours playing Nintendo or something like that counts...
Sweetest thing that special someone has ever done for you: When he proposed to me! Now all we have to do is wait for human-paramecium marriages to be made legal...

Juicy Stuff

Have you ever skinny dipped?: Nope.
If so, been caught?: N/A.
Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: Simpsons strip trivia with a stereotypical teenage male AOLer. I won. Whoop-de-do.
Have you ever been intoxicated?: Nope.
If so, when and with who?: N/A.
Favorite place to be kissed?: N/A.
Have you ever been caught "doing something?": Doing... something? I'm not sure *exactly* what you're getting at, but I can think of several possibilities, and the answer to all of them is "no".
Are you a tease?: Nope.

Opposite Sex

Boxers or briefs?: I should care?
Long or short hair?: Middling.
Dark or light hair?: Dark.
Eye color: Not terribly picky, but I like things like green and very very dark brown which you don't see too often.
Short or tall?: Tallish.
Mr. Sensitive or Mr. Funny? Both?
Good guy or bad guy?: Good. *does the Little Goody Two-Shoes dance till someone blows off her head with a shotgun*
Piercings?: Nuh-uh.
perfume/cologne: Uhh... anything as long as it isn't particularly strong, and as long as it doesn't smell like the aftershave my dad uses.
Snowboarders or surfers?: Websurfers.
Greek or geek?: Geek!
Tan or fair?: Suntan versus fair, fair wins. Naturally darker skin versus fair, either's good. Suntan bad. Sun bad. Mmm, cancer.
Stubble or neatly shaven?: Stubble.
Outdoorsy or sportsy?: No thank you.
Accent or none?: Don't particularly care.
Feature you notice first: I dunno.

Are you a(n)...

Wuss: Oh heck yeah.
Druggie: *smokes some ants* *floats briefly*
Gang member: Oh heck no.
Daydreamer: Absolutely.
Alcoholic: Absolutely not.
Freak: Yep!
Dork: Uh huh.
Bitch/Asshole: I think so. I seem to have most of you fooled, though; you'd probably almost all disagree with me. :P
Brat: Very much so.
Sarcastic: Often.
Goody-goody: Yep!
Angel: Ehh...
Devil: Ehh...
Horny: No.
Friend: I try!
Shy: Incredibly.
Talkative: Sometimes, in the right settings.
Adventurous: See above. Very adventurous when it comes to bizarre food items I see in the store, though. "Snow pea crisps? Ooooh, must try..." The squid jerky was much better.
Joker: Sometimes.
Pimp/Playa: Nope.
Call-girl: Heh heh... uh, NO.
Sporty: Nope.
Intelligent: Kindasorta.
Flirty: Not particularly. Why freak innocent guys out like that?

Th'end.